I didn’t want to admit I was a failure, I didn’t want to face the possibility of raising two kids alone. Forget about that fact that I was currently nursing my 9 month old daughter; I hadn’t been employed in two years and I hadn’t finished my degree. How would I take care of my children?
I have been a single mom for more than 20 years. Fortunately, I figured it out. During that time, I completed my degree, I opened a consulting practice, I organized to reduce infant mortality, eliminate youth violence and improve the quality of grocery stores in our diverse and working class neighborhood.
I have coached parents struggling to get their children through the public school system and worked to create policy that would make it easier.
And, through it all my girls were with me. I nursed Arianna while negotiating with school administrators. Sandra climbed on the furniture when I attended public meetings. They both came to campaign headquarters to complete their homework and then stuff envelopes. When I ran for office, they doorbelled and organized student volunteers.
I coached their softball teams, organized PTSA fundraisers, watched soccer matches in the rain, attended music performances and school plays.
It hasn’t always been easy but it was never boring! There were days when I was “digging in my pockets for spare change” broke and occasions when I thought my kids would make me tear my hair out.
However, we had a good life despite my single motherhood. I enjoyed the experience of raising my children — especially as they grew older.
I often wonder if I was a better mother because I was single.
The Momarchy began as a column in a local newspaper to share the wisdom gathered from friends, family, wise women and involved fathers. My girls and I reaped the benefits of their advice and I hope their collective wisdom can help you as much as it helped me.
Ultimately, it is my sincerest wish The Momarchy will help all moms live their life to the fullest while raising their children — without guilt.